Reading, Blogging, And Blogging Some More
-
-
after inputting some complex algorithms into my super computer i’ve determined what tumblr will look like in the year 2020
i love how this comes back after every shitty update staff makes
(via the-grollican)
-
this website’s moderation sucks ass and it has a terrible bot problem and there are an enormous amount of bugs but thankfully we have a staff team hard at work not addressing any of these but instead making shitty ui changes that nobody wants
(via the-grollican)
-
-
-
-
10 or 11 little ducks have been spotted crossing the dash board
(via kubleeka)
-
It is 1880s America, you are about to spawn as a Historically Significant White Guy. Choose a class:
TROUBLEMAKING FRONTIER PREACHER
- Special Power: Good Christian. Your vague adherence to American protestantism will ensure that law enforcement does not bother you whatsoever.
- Victory condition: Fuck enough of your followers wives to start an inbred theofascist micronation.
MANICALLY AMBITIOUS CON ARTIST
- Special Power: Basic Literacy. You’re poor, but you know how to read. They’ll never expect it. You may forge literally any document and it will be believed 100% of the time.
- Victory Condition: Steal enough money to fuck off to Latin America. A Spanish speaking nation might as well be the moon to your debtors.
EUROPEAN NOBLE FAILSON
- Special Power: Colonial Wealth. Your funny accent, foppish dress, and noble title, will make any American think you are totally good to buy it on credit.
- Victory Condition: Become the boytoy to the wife of some borderline-gangster politician and save up enough political capital to run for office and get addicted to opium.
DOOMED FRONTIER EXPLORER
- Special Power: How The Fuck Are You Alive. Your freakish diet of pork, whiskey, and maple syrup, makes you entirely immune to all physical injury and disease. Somehow.
- Victory Condition: You have one mission, and one mission only. You need to piss off some completely friendly natives. You need to piss them off so bad they leave your stupid ass to starve in a food forest they’ve been cultivating for literally thousands of years.
(via kubleeka)
-
they put guitars in it
the music
good lord there’s instrumence in here
(via kubleeka)
-
(via kubleeka)
-
shitposting-hobbits-to-gallifrey:
BTW for anyone too lazy to do the math a wage of $125 a day works out to about $15/hour for an 8-hour workday so….. someone in 1923 definitely had a vision of the future
(via teaboot)
-
-
If I can recommend you do 1 low-effort thing for the love of God it is this:
Keep 5 cards in your pocket. One will say “yes”, the second will say “no.”
If you lose your voice, or lose speech, or want to make a dramatic embellishment at the right time, it is an elegant and efficient solution that is right there at hand.
But what if people question you from there? “Why do you have that card? Why would you do this? How long have you had that in your pocket?” For this, or whatever else they say, the third card: “I don’t have a card for that.”
“What the fuck,” they ask. They laugh. They are bemused. You bring the energy back down with the fourth card: “I have laryngitis. I’ve lost speech. My throat hurts”. Whatever you expect to occur.
The joke is over. Rule of threes. Now they are curious. YThey wonder about logistics. “How did you know I would say that? Is everyone so predictable?”
As a three-part bit, nobody ever sees the fifth card coming.
“I have powerful wizard magics.”
Gets them every time
(via somecunttookmyurl)
-
-
This list includes doctors in the United States, Australia, Canada, and Europe!
Even if you’re not the target demographic, please share for any of your friends who may be.
And if you or someone you know would like to be added to the list, there’s a place for that!
(via etotheoneeyeowl)
